-"So, after the eleventh margarita, I talk Doofus here into sticking this Roman Candle in his butt and trying to aim the flaming balls over the fence into Guantanamo! The guards nearly pissed themselves laughing, and I got the whole thing on MiniDV; check out the video on Break.com!"
-"Oh, sure, you used to see Russians doing this Revolution of the People gig; that is, until all of these good paying jobs ended up being done by undocumented scabs working for cash, like these two jokers right here. Tonight on the
O'Reilly Factor we discuss this important issue with some generic liberal twit and a dweeby commie professor type, right after these announcements...."
-"Yeah, yeah, here to cheer the old man up; I'm tellin ya, you start playing
'El Condor Pasa' one more time on this here flute, and I'm stuffing this thing right up your ass!"
-"I wish I could quit you."
-"No wonder you ended up in the hospital, dummy; this thing is wired for 110 volts, and you have 220 on this damn island!"
-"Hey, consider yourself lucky, dude; every other drummer from
Spinal Tap ended up dead!"
-"Party on, Wayne!"
"Party on, Garth!"
"
SCHWINNNG!"
-(Fidel thinks to himself:)
"Oh, sure, here comes the "I beat George Bush with this stick, and he cried like a little girl!" story. The way
I heard it, ol' Hugo still has the Presidential Seal embossed in intaglio on his right buttock, and they had to use side-scan sonar to find the damn stick!"
-"Okay, Hugo, exactly how
DO you say "butt spelunker" in Spanish??"
In dreams I kiss your hand, Imam
